It’s three a.m and I can’t sleep. This week was supposed to be all about happiness and new beginnings. My son graduated from high school on Monday. We had a great day and are very proud of him. I sure thought the rest of the week would be wonderful as well leading up to his big bash on Saturday when about 50 family and friends would descend on our house for BBQ and swimming and honoring the graduate.
Since almost as soon as the ceremony was over, several things have happened to bring the joy down and cause me to be up at this hour praying for friends and feeling blue. One dear, dear friend suffered a terrible loss and I want to be near her to offer support but can only offer love from a distance. Two other friends have been deeply hurt by ugliness and all I can do is offer them an ear to listen to their sadness. I’ve already been hurt by the same contingent of people so I know how it feels and had moved on to the acceptance stage for my own loss but their angst is bringing me down. I know I need to be there for them but it’s really affecting me to be embroiled in the controversy again.
I’m an empath and have always been super sensitive to the feelings of sadness or happiness of others. I take these feelings into my own psyche. When things are good with the people I care about, it’s a wonderful thing. When things are not, it’s a physical pain I get in my heart.
I’m feeling this pain right now and can’t seem to settle it down to allow myself to rest.
So, this is not one of my usual lighthearted posts, but we all know part of this journey (sometimes a big part) called life can be hard. I’m weary right now. Tired to the bone.
Pray for my friends that they find peace in what they are each going through. After all, a burden shared is a load lightened. I know you all will share this grief I’m feeling for my friends and help me in the process to move past the ache in my own heart for them.
Thanks for being such a great community to belong to. I’m privileged to call you each my friends.